Changing Fenns jammies in the morning, they had a little pea on them. . .

Fenn, "Oh man I had a little side wiener again."
Me, "That's ok, let's just get this off and get dressed."
Fenn, very menacingly, "My wiener is destructive now."

Rachel, "Fenn what are you going to do when Hazel can talk?"
Fenn, "I'm going to cry."
Rachel, "Why?"
Fenn, "Because seh won't be a baby anymore."

Fenn walks in swinging his "battle ax", "Mom are you already married?"
Me, "Yes bud, I'm married to daddy."
Fenn starts crying, literally crying, "But I wanted to marry you."
Me, teared up, "I know and if I would have met you before daddy I would have married you instead."

Watching "The Masters" on T.V. . .

Fenn, "Mom will you teach me to golf?"
Me, "I don't really know how to golf Fenn."
Fenn, "Will daddy teach me?"
Me,  "I don't really think daddy knows too much about golf either. If you want to learn golf we will have to see if there is somebody at the golf course who can give you lessons when you are a little bit older."

The next day . . .

Fenn, "Dad, will you teach me to fish?"
Gib (with tears of joy in his eyes), "Yes, buddy, of course I will."
Fenn, "And I'll teach you to golf."

Shopping for Super Bowl treats with Gib . . .
"I just can't imagine watching the Super Bowl without Cheetos!"

Writing a letter to Santa in February . . .
"Mom do you know how to spell actually?"
"Yes."
"How?"
"A-c-t-u-a-l-l-y."
"Do you know how to spell Scooby-Doo?"
"Yes. S-c-o"
"No! It's h-a-dot com."

Me, "Fenn you want to be my workout partner?"
Fenn, "Yeah, what do we do on that project mom?"
Me, "We watch the guy and do what he does. He's like a teacher. We listen. If he says kick we kick, if he says punch we punch."
Fenn, "Yeah, if he says do a sweet move, we do a sweet move."

Gib's been gone alot. Fenn and I have spent a lot of time together. He says, "ahhh, your giving me the nuts!" instead of your driving me nuts.

Playing out in the snow . . .
Fenn, "I have to go potty? Can I pea in the snow?"
Me, "Yes. Get up here and I'll help you get your clothes off"
10 minutes later he finally gets up the top of the hill and I have unzipped his coat, unzipped his snow pants, pulled down his sweats, long johns and undies, and taken off his mittens. I say, "O.k. hold your wiener and pea."
Fenn in very sad winey voice, "Your gonna have to hold it. My hands are freezin."
Katie, "Mel, your gonna have to hold it."

I'm feeling really bad because I haven't been keeping this up and I forget so quickly the things he says that crack me up. I MUST do better.

Tonight while browsing the Internet for, what else, swords, we had these conversations.
Fenn, "Whoa! What is that?"
Me, "That's a Kit Rae Avolovh Milthrodion Custom Fantasy Sword."
Fenn, "I want it."
Me, "Its $109.99"
Fenn, "That costs a lot of money. I want it. What store is it at?"
Me, "True Swords.com."

A few minutes later (mind you I am talking on the phone while looking at swords, I know its wrong, but I HATE looking at swords on line) . . .
Fenn, "That's a shit sword."
Me, "What? Are you swearing?"
Fenn, "Noooo."

A few minutes later (just hung the phone up and then had to call back and relate this little gem) . . .
Fenn, "What is that?"
Me, "That is a Kit Rae Custom Necklace Pendant Valdris. Its a sword necklace."
Fenn, "That's ridiculous."
Me, in my mind, "Thank you LORD!"

Dancing around the bathroom to the Hairspray CD while Fenn and Hazel bathe . . .
Fenn, "Stop doing that! Your not a grill, your a mommy!"

Running around naked after a bath (for quite awhile), "Look at my wiena."
Mom, "Why? What's it doing?"
Fenn in total amazement, "It's pointing at ya."

Gib changing Fenn's diaper about 6:45 a.m. . . .
Fenn in a sleepy voice, "My wing-ding is hanging out."
Gib, "Yeah, your wing-ding is."
Fenn, "I just don't know about that crazy wing-ding."

Later on when I told Great-Grandma Tucker about it she laughed and said, "Just tell him he better take care of it, no matter what!"

In a sticky sweet voice, Fenn says, "Daddy, I'm rubbing your face. Daddy, I'm touching your face and rubbing it."

Daddy laying there relaxed on the couch, "I know you are buddy."

Fenn in a not so sweet, but a touch of evil says, "Daddy, I'm rubbing your face with my hands. And they've been on my bottom."

I was kicking a soccer ball back and forth with Fenn. He decided to toss it up in the air and kick it. . .
Me, "Oh, your getting tricky now?"
Fenn (in a very, that was stupid question tone), "Yeah! I'm your son."

After using his swimming teacher's goggles Fenn says, "If I poop on the potty will you buy me some blue noggles?"

Gib, "Yes."

2 days later, Fenn poops on potty and says, "Ok, take me to Walmart to buy noggles."

While unbuckling his carseat 20 minutes later in the Walmart parking lot and trying to remember what he calls them mom says, "Let's go get your blue noogles."

Fenn looks at mom very perplexed, and says, "You mean noggles."

Mom, "Yes, I mean noggles."

While driving home from a family party about 9:45 p.m.

"Look at the moon mom. Do you see it? It's coming with us. Hey the moons coming with us."

Katie whispers in Fenn's ear, "When are you going to start going potty on the toilet like a big boy?"
Fenn thinks for a second, "Um, Thursday night."

Situation: Lynlee changing Fenn's diaper
Fenn, "Is is black?"
Lynlee, "No."
Fenn, "Is it green?"
Lynlee, "No."
Fenn, "Then what color is it?"
Lynlee, "Brown."
Fenn, "Hmm. It smells black."

Throwing pinecones in Twin Lakes. . .

Fenn, "Ouch. I got cut by a pineapple."